Nudge Challenge Week 13 = Compliments & Criticism
NUDGED: "Compliment a stranger"
BACKSTORY: I am okay with talking to strangers, but don't compliment people often that I don't know. In fact, I don't compliment people often at all. This nudge will encourage me to look for good aspects or qualities in other people to compliment them, and then say it! I am excited to see the reactions!
QUOTE: "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." - Leo Buscaglia
HIGHLIGHTS OF THE WEEK:
The easiest, most natural way for me to compliment someone is to notice a Jackrabbit or SDSU logo on clothing and then compliment them on having good taste for a good school. In fact, as I was pondering how to complete this nudge, I had several strangers compliment me on my new SDSU purse this week.
I had to wait until a good opportunity came up, until I spotted something that I wanted to acknowledge. The moment happened at Bible study this week when I saw a woman I don't know carrying a super cute tote bag with a fun saying on it. I loved it! I walked over to her and complimented her on having such a great tote bag. She smiled and was happy that I noticed, and told me where she got it (on sale!!). It was fun connecting with someone over a shared great taste. (Sidenote: I went to said store the next night to get myself one and found they were all sold out. Noooooo!! Popular item!)
This week, I also complimented other people I know (not strangers) since everyone can use a compliment. I told a friend I liked her beautiful necklace and complimented the beautiful dress another woman was wearing.
LESSONS LEARNED: The hard part. I was really convicted this week not by how few honest compliments I give, but how critical my words can be sometimes. I was reading a book ("Marriage Rules" by Harriet Lerner, PhD) this week that explained how critical and judgmental words can be very hurtful to others, especially to our spouses. The book suggested having a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions - saying 5 good things with 1 negative thing. The book also recommended to take a one-a-day challenge where I only say one critical thing a day. This will help me to think more clearly about what matters in life and let the rest go. I kept this in mind this week and will continue to work on it. It was a very tough, convicting week!!!
NEXT UP: I just drew the next nudge from the wooden box, and it is "put together a puzzle". YAY! It is something I used to enjoy doing but don't have time for any more. This week, I will make doing puzzles and having fun a priority!
BACKSTORY: I am okay with talking to strangers, but don't compliment people often that I don't know. In fact, I don't compliment people often at all. This nudge will encourage me to look for good aspects or qualities in other people to compliment them, and then say it! I am excited to see the reactions!
QUOTE: "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." - Leo Buscaglia
HIGHLIGHTS OF THE WEEK:
The easiest, most natural way for me to compliment someone is to notice a Jackrabbit or SDSU logo on clothing and then compliment them on having good taste for a good school. In fact, as I was pondering how to complete this nudge, I had several strangers compliment me on my new SDSU purse this week.
I had to wait until a good opportunity came up, until I spotted something that I wanted to acknowledge. The moment happened at Bible study this week when I saw a woman I don't know carrying a super cute tote bag with a fun saying on it. I loved it! I walked over to her and complimented her on having such a great tote bag. She smiled and was happy that I noticed, and told me where she got it (on sale!!). It was fun connecting with someone over a shared great taste. (Sidenote: I went to said store the next night to get myself one and found they were all sold out. Noooooo!! Popular item!)
This week, I also complimented other people I know (not strangers) since everyone can use a compliment. I told a friend I liked her beautiful necklace and complimented the beautiful dress another woman was wearing.
LESSONS LEARNED: The hard part. I was really convicted this week not by how few honest compliments I give, but how critical my words can be sometimes. I was reading a book ("Marriage Rules" by Harriet Lerner, PhD) this week that explained how critical and judgmental words can be very hurtful to others, especially to our spouses. The book suggested having a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions - saying 5 good things with 1 negative thing. The book also recommended to take a one-a-day challenge where I only say one critical thing a day. This will help me to think more clearly about what matters in life and let the rest go. I kept this in mind this week and will continue to work on it. It was a very tough, convicting week!!!
NEXT UP: I just drew the next nudge from the wooden box, and it is "put together a puzzle". YAY! It is something I used to enjoy doing but don't have time for any more. This week, I will make doing puzzles and having fun a priority!
Go jacks!
ReplyDelete