Turning 36
Today is my 36th birthday. I don’t feel a need to
hide the real number and am not afraid of getting older. Through volunteering
with hospice, I’ve learned what a gift and privilege it is to have birthdays.
Not everyone gets more years.
I find myself looking back today. This is the fourth time I
have had a “6” in my age. I have been reminiscing about my birthdays when I
turned 6, 16 and 26. It’s fun to look back and see my growth. My life and
situation really changed for each age, especially since it is a snapshot of
when I was a child, a teenager, and newly married adult. Each age had aspects I
enjoyed and things that I lacked.
At age 6, I had fun and family. I had a happy childhood with
lots of time to play and explore, along with a supportive family. I felt secure
and loved. I had it all…except physical strength. Monkey bars. I quit
gymnastics, something that I was really interested in, because I couldn’t even
hang on the monkey bars. I didn’t have any upper body strength and still don’t
today.
For my 36th year of life, I want to work on my physical
strength. I plan to do more strength training to become the strongest, best
version of me. And I want to FINALLY be able to cross the monkey bars.
Six-year-old me would be cheering!
At age 16, I was in good shape from marching band and lots
of walking to classes at a big high school. I was surrounded by music, family,
and friends, and I did well academically. But, I lacked emotional stability
(darn hormones!!) and struggled finding healthy relationships. I was young and
had a lot to learn.
For my 36th year of life, I want to have
emotional and relational stability. I am blessed to be married to a wonderful
man and feel secure in our relationship. There are still days when I find
myself feeling emotional (darn hormones!) and I am tempted to trust my
temporary feelings as statements of fact. I plan to rely more on the truth
instead of my changing wave of emotions. Teenage me would be impressed,
cheering and crying for the change (ha!).
At age 26, I was a newly married adult. While our
relationship had the occasional bump in the road as every new marriage does, we
were happy to be together in the same city after three years of being long
distance. Unfortunately we struggled with our finances during these early
years. We experienced job loss and unemployment, and had high student loan and
rent payments.
For my 36th year of life, I want to have
financial security. My husband and I are both working full-time now and making
better financial decisions. We still have debt we are working to pay off,
balancing those obligations with taking vacations and doing fun things too.
It’s time! It’s time to work on my physical, emotional,
relational, and financial strength in this 36th year of my life. I
am looking forward to what this year will bring. I hope it makes 46-year-old
Carrie smile!
Get fierce! :)
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